ENOUGH!
by Spirit Burner AKA Chick Feed
Summary: There was nothing on this earth, nor in Heaven or Hell, that could hurt him as badly as his own brother.  Longer summary inside. Rated "T" for adult content.  No "wincest" etc., consenting M/F sex .
1. Chapter 1

_A.N. I guess a kind of missing episode between 4.16 & 4.17. Rated T for some sexualised content which just kind of happened as part of the story and which is something I have **never** written about before, so it was kind of a surprise & made me blush! (**Not** "wincest" in case that's what you're after. Not my thing.)_

_Disclaimer : Despite hunting for a spell that might make it so, they are still not mine and I think it's totally unfair!_

_**ENOUGH!**_

_There was nothing on this earth, nor in Heaven or Hell, _

_that could hurt him as badly as his own brother._

Set between Season 4 episode 4.16 (Dean is used to torture Alistair) and 4.17 (AU where

Dean & Sam have normal jobs, aren't brothers and know nothing about hunting).

_WARNING : Mention of consenting M/F sex and sexual feelings (**No slash **etc..)_

**1.**

Bobby popped his head out of the kitchen when he heard the boys come downstairs, closely followed by the sound of his front door forcefully slamming shut. Dean was stood, looking at the closed door, he was clearly angry. Bobby cleared his throat,

"Sam gone out somewhere?"

"Sure looks that way."

Dean rubbed a hand across his chin irritably before turning to Bobby,

"Could use a coffee."

As Dean sat himself at the table, Bobby diplomatically made no comment about the sulky expression on Dean's face and simply served up his breakfast.

"Should I cook Sam's, or put it on hold?"

Dean shrugged,

"I'd put it on hold. He said he was going for a drive to clear his head."

Bobby grabbed his own breakfast and sat himself opposite Dean.

"You two ok?"

Dean shuffled his bacon around on the plate with his fork.

"Yeah…..No…..Oh...I dunno Bobby. I really don't."

"Anythin' you wanna share?"

Dean shook his head, still pushing his food around. Bobby nodded his understanding,

"Ok. I guess you'll sort it between you…..You gonna eat that breakfast or just shovel it round some more?"

Dean began to eat, managing two mouthfuls before slamming his cutlery down and putting his head in his hands,

"I can't do it Bobby. I can't do what he wants. I can't be what he wants anymore, or what anyone wants me to be. I just can't. I'm sick of it and I'm done with it. All of it."

Bobby sighed and he too stopped eating, pushing his plate away. This sounded like it was going to become one of _those_ conversations.

"Mind telling me what _**it**_ is?"

Dean lifted his head and looked at Bobby, his eyes glistening,

"What's the point? It'd make no difference. It's not like it matters to anyone how I feel. That's been made plain enough time and time again. All my life. All I've ever been is someone else's toy soldier, starting with Dad. First I have to protect Sam. Then I'm supposed to protect the world, stop seals being broken, stop the Devil himself. An' if I get hurt? So what? I'm supposed to just suck it up an' carry on. Well….I can't anymore. You know what? This world doesn't care about Dean Winchester, so why should I give a shit about the world? It can all go to Hell in a pink ribbon, I've had _enough_."

By the time Dean finished, the tears were running freely down his face. Bobby put his elbows on the table, hands clasped together. His heart ached for the young man sat across from him.

"This has been hanging around since the thing with Alistair an' the angels, hasn't it?"

Dean pushed his chair away from the table and stood up,

"Yeah, 'course. That's it Bobby. I got a little bumped an' bruised an' I guess I'm just havin' a hissy fit. Nothin' to worry about. Dean's a good little soldier. He'll get over it an' then he'll do what he's told. No problem."

Dean turned and walked out. Bobby called after him but got no response, just the sound of his front door being opened and closed again, albeit softly this time.

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	2. Chapter 2

**2.**

Without any real conscious plan to do so, Sam found himself driving into town. He parked up and for a while he wandered aimlessly. On the outside he seemed to be nothing more than a tall good looking young man, strolling along deep in thought. But on the inside he was a swirling mass of fear, frustration and, above all else, anger. Everything he was feeling was currently directed at one single person, Dean.

In his mind he re-played that morning's argument. Sure, it wasn't the first time his brother had claimed to be "done" with everything. Not the first time he had said he wanted to have nothing more to do with demons, angels, the whole bag of shit. But it seemed different this time. This time Sam thought Dean might just do it. He might just turn his back on everything they had achieved, on the world in general and, worst of all, on Sam himself.

Sam angrily kicked at an empty coke can that was laying in the street, accidentally bouncing it off a shop window. A shop worker turned at the sudden noise and gave Sam an annoyed glare. Sam simply glared back then carried on walking, hands thrust deep in the pockets of his jeans.

The more his mind poured over Dean's threat to quit, the angrier and the more frustrated he became. He didn't notice that when he his direction took him closer towards a woman walking her dog, the dog appeared to become more nervous as the distance between them shrank. Or that by the time the woman walked past him, the dog was staring at him and cowering, it's tail firmly between it's legs as it softly whimpered. Sam kept walking as the dog's owner stopped to reassure her dog, wondering what had caused such a reaction in her normally confident hound. She didn't make the connection that the further away Sam got, the more settled the dog gradually became.

A little girl of around age 7 who was cheerfully skipping along behind her mother suddenly stopped skipping and reached for her mother's hand, her fear filled eyes on Sam as he walked by them in the opposite direction. Once they had passed each other the girl turned, watching Sam's back as he moved on. The girl kept a firm grip on her mother's hand all the way to school that morning. Sam, however, remained oblivious to the impact he was having.

Eventually his direction took him past a bar. Sam stopped, maybe a drink would help. It seemed to work for Dean.

As Sam walked toward the entrance door, the door swung open for him seemingly of it's own accord. Sam was only vaguely aware of the occurrence, recognising briefly that it was his own power crackling in and around his anger that had opened the door. Sam didn't care.

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	3. Chapter 3

**3.**

Dean's distress flared to a new level when he saw that wherever Sam had stormed off to, he had taken Dean's beloved Impala. _"Damn it Sam. If you damage my baby at_ _all your ass is grass when you get back!"_

It felt to Dean as if by that one action, Sam had signalled clearly how little he cared about Dean's wishes and just how much lack of respect he had for his older brother. Dean kicked at the tyre of one of Bobby's junk cars angrily. He pulled his cell phone out of his jeans pocket and tapped Sam's name up on speed dial. His thumb hovered over the button,

"Shit!"

Dean switched his phone off and jammed it back in his pocket. He wrenched open the door of the junker and sat himself down in the driver's seat. He adjusted the back of the seat until he was laid back at a 45 degree angle before placing his head against the headrest and closing his eyes.

His mind drifted back to the words Sam had slung at him that morning, _"Y'know what? You're pathetic." "I never realised you were_ _such a quitter Dean." "You just can't handle the fact that I'm stronger and better than you." "You should be thanking me for rescuing your ass yet again." "Go on…..walk away. I doubt anyone will notice Dean." "Look at you….you're weak." "At least I can rely on Ruby." "You make me sick Dean." "Only one of us has what it takes Dean, and it sure as hell isn't you!"_

Dean rubbed at his eyes with the heels of his hands in irritation as tears threatened to form,

"Cas….Why? Why do you all keep doing this to me?"

Despite Dean's plea, there was no soft sound of feathered wings and there was no answer given.

Dean placed both hands on the steering wheel, then leaning forward, he lay his forehead against the back of his hands. Desolate, feeling completely alone, Dean allowed his tears to fall.

XXX

Bobby stood, both hands grasping the edge of the kitchen sink as he stared out of the window without really focusing on anything. He was used to the brothers arguing, sometimes even falling out and not speaking to each other for a while. But he struggled to recall ever being witness to a disagreement leaving Dean looking as broken, or of hearing such a tone of loneliness and surrender in Dean's voice.

Bobby was seriously worried. He had no idea where Sam had gone but he figured nothing was likely to get sorted unless these two knuckleheads were together in the same place. Turning away from the window he dialled Sam's number on his cell. After two rings it switched into voicemail.

"Sam, it's Bobby. I know you boys have had a fallout. I'm just checking you're ok. Call me, asap."

Bobby sighed and turned to look out of the kitchen window again. He was pretty sure Dean was still somewhere in the salvage yard but Bobby knew that actually finding him could still be a pain in the ass. He decided to leave well alone until he had the chance to talk to Sam and try to persuade him to come home.

Throwing the untouched breakfasts into the trash, he wandered out to the workshop to find something to keep himself occupied whilst he waited for Sam to ring back.

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	4. Chapter 4

**4.**

This time of day there were less than a handful of customers populating the bar. Sam paid them no heed as he walked over to the counter and sat himself down on a tall stool at one end. Only one member of bar staff was on duty, a middle aged man with a distinct paunch and thinning grey hair which hung loose down to his waist. He sauntered over to Sam.

"What'll it be?"

Sam cast his eyes over the selection of spirits available,

"I'll start with a whiskey and dry ginger….make it a double."

The man raised one eyebrow at Sam's request and glanced at his watch tellingly, although he had enough experience not to comment out loud. The man nodded and grabbed a clean whisky tumbler.

Sam took the opportunity to finally have a glance at his fellow morning drinkers, initially seeing nothing of interest in the three other men all sat alone. A figure sat at the other end of the bar, however, was a touch more interesting.

Sat alone and seemingly oblivious to Sam as she stared into the glass she held cupped in her hands was a woman that Sam guessed to be in her mid thirties. Sam noted that, even though she was seated, she looked tall for a woman. Not a string bean, she struck Sam as being well proportioned with curves where there ought to be curves. She was wearing a tight fitting scarlet shirt which had enough buttons left open for Sam to be able to clearly see the curve of her breasts and the top edge of a lacy black bra. Completing her outfit was a hip hugging short denim skirt. Her long legs were bare and she wore simple white canvas pumps on her feet. Her dark auburn hair tumbled in natural looking waves to just below her shoulders.

Any other time Sam would find her interesting and attractive enough to start up a conversation. He turned away again.

The woman raised her head and watched as the barman added the dry ginger to Sam's drink. Her eyes followed the man as he wandered back to where Sam sat. At that point she stopped watching the barman and focused instead on Sam's profile. A slow smile began to form as she shifted her gaze down Sam's length, checking out his physique as if she were choosing a fresh, ripe piece of fruit.

She waited for the barman to take Sam's change back to him, then catching the man's eye, she lifted one finger off her glass to let him know she wanted serving. The barman fixed on his best smile, the one he kept practising in the bathroom mirror, as he walked towards her,

"Something you desire beautiful lady? I am at your service."

The barman didn't miss the woman's surreptitious glance that she threw towards the younger man sat and the other end of the bar when he asked what she desired. He sighed, lucked out again.

"Lady?"

The woman gave him an uninterested look before nodding her head towards Sam,

"I'll have whatever he ordered and another one for him with my compliments. Make his a double again. I'll just have a single."

The man nodded and took the money she held out to him. Taking her eyes off Sam, she emptied the glass in her hands and waited for the barman to bring her the next, watching then as the man strolled down to Sam bearing her offering.

Sam was deep in thought and he jumped slightly as the barman plonked another whisky and dry in front of him. Sam gave him a confused look.

"From the lady over there, with her compliments."

"Oh….thanks."

As the barman walked away and Sam turned to raise the glass in salute at the woman he had been admiring earlier, he heard the barman mutter "Lucky bastard."

The woman smiled and, taking Sam's acknowledgement as a signal, she gracefully slid off her stool and walked across to him. As she stood Sam saw he had been right about her being tall. Her never ending legs taking her up to an easy 5 11. Sam had thought that he didn't want any company, but seeing this stunning Amazon walk towards him hips swaying, blue grey eyes looking at him in open want, he decided he could make an exception.

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	5. Chapter 5

**5.**

Dean granted himself the luxury of tears for a while before fighting to reign them in. His eyes felt gritty and swollen, a band of pain wrapped itself around his forehead and he still felt like an emotional wreck, but now he had a plan.

He eased himself out of the junk car, feeling the pounding in his head intensify as he stood upright. He took a moment to let his headache settle back to it's previous level of discomfort before slowly making his way back to the house, desperately hoping he would be able to go unnoticed by Bobby.

He soundlessly opened the front door and stood, listening. Hearing nothing he stepped inside and paused again. The house felt empty and Dean breathed a sigh of relief before heading up to the bedroom he shared with Sam whenever they stayed at Bobby's.

Dean looked around the familiar room, taking in the beds, both sets of bedclothes still rumpled and untidy. Walking over to his, he lifted up the pillow, retrieving the knife he still kept with him at night even here. Bending, he pulled his duffle out from under the bed and, methodically, Dean began to pack.

XXX

Having been assured that Audra had no interest in any kind of long term relationship, Sam slung his arm across her shoulder as they walked the couple of blocks to her apartment. His hand was already sliding up her skirt to stroke the outside of her thigh as Audra unlocked the door. Pulling Sam's other arm around her waist, Audra guided Sam into the apartment, moving away from him long enough to close and lock the door behind them.

Sam immediately turned her towards him and began to hungrily kiss her lips and neck, His hand once again straying up her skirt, his fingers hooked around the lace band of her thong. Audra placed a hand over his and twisted her stance slightly until Sam's hand now rested against the tiny triangle of lace covering her crotch. Sam began to rhythmically rub his hand gently over the area, one finger sneaking under the covering of lace. Audra put her lips to his ear,

"The lounge."

With some reluctance Sam stopped his attentions and allowed Audra to guide him by the hand into the lounge. Sam glanced around as Audra let go of his hand and moved across to a glass topped coffee table, on top of which stood a simple pale wood tray of three crystal decanters and two tumblers. Filling the tumblers with an amber coloured liquid, she turned back to Sam and handed one to him. Sam accepted the drink,

The lounge area was large and airy, decorated and furnished in light creams and palest greys. One wall was almost entirely taken up by large windows hung with simple muslin. A pair of central glass doors opened up onto a narrow full length balcony. The walls were bare apart from two abstract paintings which between them provided the only strong splashes of colour within the room. The over large and deep cushioned couch was covered in a pale dove grey velvet and the blonde wood flooring was softened with two large light cream rugs which looked expensively inviting, giving rise to the temptation to stand on them in bare feet and massage the deep thick cut pile with your toes.

The whole place was a haven of light which felt slightly at odds with the dark mood Sam had been harbouring since…. Sam refused to let his mind go there and, instead focused entirely on Audra as she shrugged off her pumps and moved to sit in the centre of one of the soft and inviting rugs. Placing her glass carefully onto the wood of the floor, she looked up expectantly at Sam as she slowly began to undo the buttons of her shirt.

Sam moved over to join her on the rug,

"Nice place you've got here."

Audra smiled,

"Thanks. But unless you're some kind of interior design geek, I'm pretty sure I've got something more interesting than my décor for you to get excited about."

XXX

Sam lay naked on the rug, hands behind his head. He heard Audra switch on the shower in her bathroom as she called to him to make himself a drink if he wanted.

The sex had definitely been a distraction for Sam, but that's all it had been It hadn't acted as the release for his feelings towards his brother that he had hoped for. Sam found himself just as pissed off and frustrated at that morning's argument as he had been before Audra came along. Unfortunately, Sam knew it had reflected in his performance. He had the good grace to feel some shame in the fact that he had been more interested in his own needs being served than in giving much time for hers. He was grateful to Audra for the fact that she made no comment about his hunger or his rush to bury himself deep inside her, with only a nod to any kind of foreplay.

Sam sat up and looked around for his clothes, feeling the sudden need to get out of the apartment. He needed to get back to Bobby's. He needed to finish things with Dean. It was, he realised, the only way to rid himself of his anger and, hopefully, make Dean see sense.

He stood up and dressed hurriedly. A quick look around for pen and paper revealed neither and so he simply walked out of the apartment, closing the door softly behind himself.

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	6. Chapter 6

**6.**

It didn't take Dean long to pack and, having little else to do, he busied himself for a little longer by straightening his and Sam's bedding. Dean had no option other than to wait for his brother to return from wherever he was with the Impala.

He laid down on top of his bed and tried to doze, hoping this would serve to get rid of the headache that still plagued him.

Thirty minutes later he gave up.

Grabbing his belongings Dean made his way downstairs feeling no small amount of anxiety at what Bobby's reaction was likely to be when he noticed Dean's duffle sat in the hallway, ready to go.

Dean allowed himself to relax a little when he found that find Bobby wasn't around. Going to the kitchen he set up the coffee. Pouring himself one he sat down at the kitchen table, and settled in to wait.

XXX

Bobby looked at his watch. He had been keeping himself occupied in the workshop for close on two hours and still no phone call from Sam in response to the message he had left. As he walked back to the house he tried ringing Sam's number again and, just like previous, was put through to Sam's voicemail.

"Sam. It's me again. I expect you to ring me when you pick this up. You understand boy? You ring me! I'm not kidding here. Got it?"

Bobby hoped his tone had sounded enough like John Winchester's to force the kid to ring him. As he entered his house Dean's duffle draped over with Dean's leather jacket was the first thing he took note of. Bobby paused, taking the time to set his expression into neutral before heading into the kitchen. Sure enough, Dean sat at the table drinking coffee, his back to Bobby.

Bobby knew him well enough to be able to recognise from the set of Dean's shoulders just how tensed up the boy was.

"Is there any coffee left?"

Dean didn't turn to answer,

"Pot's almost full."

"Mind if I grab one and sit down?"

"S'your kitchen man."

Bobby walked past where Dean was sat and poured himself a coffee. Turning round to look directly at Dean, Bobby leant his back against the kitchen counter, trying not to react when he saw Dean's pale face and his eyes, red from what could only be crying.

"Saw your stuff in the hall. Take it you and Sam are heading out?"

Dean still wouldn't make full eye contact with Bobby, acting as if he had spotted the most interesting thing on the planet residing right there inside his coffee mug.

"_I'm_ heading out. Dunno about Sam. You'd have to ask him what his plans are. S'got nothin' to do with me."

At this, Bobby felt the beginnings of a headache kick start at the back of his head.

"So….You sayin' you're heading out without your brother?"

Dean nodded,

"Yup."

"Does Sam know?"

Dean finally made eye contact with Bobby and Bobby felt his stomach churn at the sight of Dean's _"couldn't care less"_ expression.

"Not yet. I'm guessing he'll figure it once he brings my car back. Don't worry, soon as I've got my baby back I'll get out of your hair."

Bobby tried to quell the mixed feelings of sadness and annoyance that were jockeying for position inside him as he sat himself down opposite Dean. Dean had turned his face away from Bobby once again.

"If you're trying to bait me boy you're going the right way about it. Look at me …

_**Dammit**_**,** I said look at me Dean."

Dean slowly turned to meet Bobby's gaze, a stubborn look of defiance on his face that conveyed the message that he wasn't about to accept any advice from anyone.

"What kind of idiotic comment was that? I'm not pushin' you _or_ Sam to leave and you know it, so don't go making out you're doin' me a favour by goin' cos, really, that's just bullshit. If you're going to_ have_ dumbass ideas about leaving, at least be man enough to admit it's your own decision, you're not being pushed."

Dean cheeks flushed, his own fury starting to bubble to the surface.

"Ok…Ok, it's my choice. I've tried telling you all that I'm done. I can't cope with this gig Bobby. I'm just not that man anymore. I'm not."

"But, the seals….?"

"I don't give a flying piece of shit right now about the seals, or Lucifer, or the so called apocalypse Bobby. I'm not up to it. I'm way off my game. Sammy's the one you all need. He's the one with _"special_ _powers." _I got nothin'. It's best for Sam if I'm not around to get in his way."

"_**It what?**_ Jesus H Christ Dean! Really! I've heard some crap come out your mouth over the years boy, but this…? It's best for _Sam_? Who you tryin' to convince with that piss poor excuse? Me or yourself?"

Dean pushed his chair back and stood up, his face flushed scarlet,

"Leave it Bobby. Just leave it."

Dean walked out of the kitchen, intending to grab his stuff and go sit by the gates at the yard entrance to wait for Sam's return. As he bent to pick up his jacket and duffle he felt a firm grip take hold of the back of his shirt and he found himself being swung around and slammed up against the wall. A second hand was placed in the centre of his back, pinning his chest flat to the wall as Bobby shoved his face an inch from Dean's ear,

"I haven't finished with you yet boy."

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	7. Chapter 7

**7.**

For a split second Dean was more startled by the speed and the sheer strength that he and Sam often forgot Bobby possessed to react. Then he began to struggle against the pressure holding him flat to the wall. Bobby simply gathered more of Dean's shirt collar and the neck of his tee in his hand and twisted until Dean's own clothing tightened around his neck.

"_Bobby!...You're choking me_….."

Bobby moved both hands off Dean releasing him, but before Dean could take advantage of it, Bobby had grabbed Dean by one shoulder and flipped him so that Dean's back was now against the wall. Bobby quickly lay one forearm across Dean's throat, pinning one of Dean's shoulders with the other hand. Dean felt Bobby change his stance slightly, effectively ensuring Dean couldn't target his vulnerable spots with his knee should Dean attempt it. Dean sighed, letting his muscles relax and dropping his arms to hang loosely by his side.

"Right. Have I got your attention now son?"

Dean's eyes narrowed,

"I'm not your son."

Bobby nodded his acknowledgement,

"No. You're not. But if you had been, if I'd had that privilege, you'd have a damn sight more respect for yourself and your worth than you've ever had as John's son. If you _were_ mine, I would've told you every day how proud I was of you and, I would've made damn certain that you understood how important you are to everyone. How much you matter. Yeah, Sam's got powers, and look what they've done to him. What they've driven him to, where they came from. The only reason Sam's still vaguely safe and still on our side, is because of you. An' that's got nothin' to do with you following daddy's orders to protect him even if it means you getting' hurt. It's because Sam loves you. He listens to you. What's it goin' to take Dean to get that through that thick skull of yours? Without you, who knows how far Sam will go? Jeeze Dean. I swear, sometimes you're enough to drive a man into the arms of hell itself….."

XXX

If it was physically possible for Bobby to have stuffed one of his own feet into his mouth, he would have done. Instead he let go of Dean and stepped back, shaking his head as he looked at Dean.

"Dean…I…."

At Bobby's outburst Dean had sagged against the wall, his head hung in defeat. Now he looked up at Bobby as Bobby stuttered over what to say to the broken man in front of him. Bobby saw Dean's eyes fill with tears. Dean slowly pushed himself away from the wall and wordlessly walked past Bobby to pick up his belongings.

As he passed by, Bobby reached out as though to touch Dean, before pulling back and simply letting his arm drop to his side. With his other hand Bobby pinched the bridge of his nose as he wondered how things had got so out of control. Dean picked up his jacket and slung the duffle over his shoulder before gazing sadly at Bobby,

"At least we both agree finally. Me being around isn't helping. Sam's got a better chance of stopping this thing without me. I hate what he's doing, the way that hell bitch is playing him. I do. But whenever he looks at me he sees a weak link. So really, maybe it _is_ me that's driving him more and more dark side, making him try to compensate for me not being up to task. If I'm not in his face, he can get on and do what he believes he needs to, without me holding him back….. I'm gonna wait outside for Sam. And Bobby? Please. Don't come after me. I mean it. Really. You've said enough."

As the door closed after Dean, Bobby walked slowly back into the kitchen and pored himself another coffee. He half raised the mug to his mouth, then instead he suddenly threw it across the kitchen. Coffee arched out of the flying mug before the mug itself shattered against the opposite wall, splattering the rest of it's contents over a large area. Bobby stared despairingly at the trails of dark brown liquid now running in rivulets down the wall.

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	8. Chapter 8

**8.**

Walking out into the fresh air had the effect of instantly making Sam's head feel woozy. He also discovered that turning his head too quickly to one side had a negative effect on his balance and made him feel as though he was on a boat out at sea. He really wasn't used to so much alcohol so early in the day especially extremely alcoholic liqueurs. His lips curled up into an animal like smile at the memory of himself slowly pouring the thick amber whiskey liqueur in between Audra's breasts and on down to her navel before bending over her to eagerly lick it off again. He wished he'd asked her the name of the drink, it had been delicious both out of the glass and off Audra's naked body.

As well as his head feeling somewhat disconnected from the rest of him, Sam realised he had another problem. When he arrived in town and began to walk, he hadn't been taking too much notice of his direction. What he clearly remembered was that when he left the bar with Audra they had turned left, but initially he had come upon the bar from the right. Using this as his start point, Sam set about trying to retrace his steps.

As he walked he pulled his phone from his pocket and switched it on. The log showed two missed calls and two voice messages. Sam tucked the phone to his ear and listened to the messages, both from Bobby. He frowned when he heard the second message, Bobby sounded insistent that Sam ring him. Feeling a slight flutter of nervousness, Sam hit speed dial for Bobby.

XXX

Bobby was wiping down the wall which had suffered from the effects of his flying coffee moment when his phone rang. Seeing Sam's ID he stopped what he was doing to answer,

"About bloody time. Where the hell are you?"

Sam pulled his phone away from his ear and momentarily looked at it in surprise.

"Erm…I'm in town. My phone was switched off. What's wrong?"

"You an' your brother. That's what's wrong! Get your ass back here. We've got a problem."

"Ok. Care to explain?"

"Dean's set on leaving, an' you ain't being invited. Is that explanation enough?

Sam sighed, feeling his earlier anger towards Dean immediately start to build up again.

"You know what Bobby? I'm not sure I give a shit right now."

When Bobby replied, his voice had become low and threatening.

"Kid. I'm _telling_ you to give a shit. Got that? You get yourself back here and you do it like I've shoved a bomb up your ass, you hear me? Don't even think about messing with me right now boy, you'll only live long enough to regret it. Do we have an understanding?

Sam caught himself nodding at the phone as if Bobby could see him and immediately regretted the effect the movement had inside his head.

"Ok Bobby. I understand. Don't suppose you could help me out in figuring a route back to the car could you?"

Once Sam had described to Bobby what he could see around himself where he stood and what he recalled had been nearby to where he had parked the Impala, then getting back to it was fairly easy. As Sam started the engine, he rang Bobby again,

"Bobby? I'm back at the car and on my way. Where's that moronic self centred idiot right now?"

XXX

As Sam drove through the entrance into the salvage yard he spotted Dean sat on the hood of the rusted remains of an old Caddie that stood off to one side of the yard gates. He noticed Dean's duffle and jacket on the floor at the side of the car. After everything else, that was all it took.

Dean glanced up as Sam drove the Impala into the yard. His initial neutral expression suddenly turned to horror as Sam slewed Dean's baby into a 90 degree turn, kicking up dust and dirt, before barrelling toward the wreck Dean was sat on, looking for all the world like he intended to ram the front of the Impala into the side of the wreck.

Sam slammed on the breaks, stopping with scant inches to spare between the two vehicles.

For a moment Dean seemed too stunned to move. Sam, however, flung open the car door and hurled himself out, lunging straight towards Dean.

Dean snapped back into himself and recovered the instinct to move, attempting to slide down off the Caddie's hood before Sam reached him. Unfortunately Sam's long legs gave him the advantage and Dean's feet had no sooner touched the floor when Sam grabbed Dean tightly around both Dean's upper arms and threw his brother back up onto the hood again.

Dean sliced open the palm of his right hand as he grabbed at the rusted metal front window frame to stop himself sliding head first through the gap where the window screen had once been, and into the busted up interior of the wreck.

Nursing his damaged hand against his chest, Dean lay still, stretched out over the car's hood and waited to see what Sam would do next. He didn't have to wait long.

Sam reached forward, grabbing the collar of Dean's shirt and dragged Dean back towards him. Dean's feet didn't get to make contact with the floor at all this time around as Sam swung him bodily from the hood and hurled Dean to the ground. Dean grunted as his back slammed against solidly packed earth. He tried to roll onto his front to push himself up, but Sam simply used a foot to flip Dean onto his back again before moving to put the same foot none too gently across Dean's throat.

Dean froze, staring up at his brother. The expression on Sam's face was feral, wild. Hate twisted his mouth. Dean had never seen Sam look at anyone _else_ that way, let alone his own brother,

"_Christo."_

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	9. Chapter 9

**9.**

Bobby heard the Impala's engine as it was driven into the yard, followed by the sound of tyres on dry earth being forced into a sharp turn.

Bobby hesitated, then decided to ignore it and give the brothers some space to talk things out. He wandered into his lounge which these days looked more like a library, and pulled a book out. Taking it back to the kitchen table, he began to flip through it, always on the look out for another way to stop Lucifer rising.

XXX

Sam looked down at his brother and shook his head,

"Won't work brother. I'm pissed off, not possessed."

"Well. In that case, get your giant size foot off my fucking throat….._**now**_!

Dean fought not to let the shock show in his eyes as Sam responded by pressing his foot harder onto Dean's throat.

"Or what?"

Dean didn't answer, instead he grabbed Sam's ankle with his injured hand and pulled, at the same time he slammed his other forearm into the side of Sam's knee. Sam hissed at the lance of pain which shot through to his kneecap and had no option but to take his foot from Dean's throat in order to stop himself from falling.

As Sam fought for balance, Dean rolled out of his brother's reach and scrambled to his feet, one hand rubbing at his throat. Sam faced Dean, glaring at his brother in fury. Dean didn't miss the fact that Sam was taking a fighting stance. Dean held his free hand out to Sam, showing the flat of his palm, trying to get Sam to just pause, to step down,

"Sam….don't. I won't do this. I won't. I just want to leave. You won't have to put up with me holding you back anymore. I'll stay out of your way."

Sam snarled at Dean,

"Yeah. Bobby told me you were set on running away, leaving the rest of us to pick up the shit _you _started."

Sam knew his words had hurt, he saw the pain in Dean's eyes. Dean looked at his brother for a moment before dropping both arms to his side and responding in a quiet voice,

"Whatever."

Dean walked over and bent to pick up his duffle bag. Suddenly the bag wasn't there as Sam kicked it away from Dean. Dean sighed. He didn't look at Sam as he again walked to pick up his bag. Again it was kicked out of his reach.

Dean stood, head bowed, his eyes on the floor.

"Ok Sammy, if this is what you want. Why not? Everyone else has had their slice. I guess it must be your turn by now. But Sam, whatever you do next I'm still gonna leave. I told Cas I'd had enough and I meant it Sam. They'll have to find someone else. Please try to understand, I'm doing this to protect you, from _me_ Sam. I can't be around you and let you carry on sucking on Ruby. I figure the best thing I can do is to leave and give you the space to do things your way. See Sammy? You were right, you _are_ stronger than me. You don't need me anymore brother. You've already got what you need. I get that now."

As Dean finished what he was saying he heard Sam begin a slow hand clap. Dean shot his brother a glowering look,

"Screw you Sam."

"Actually, already had that pleasure this morning. I passed some time getting fully acquainted with an extremely attractive woman that I met in a bar."

Dean tuned to face Sam, looking at him in exaggerated surprise.

"Really? So, how come you're still so wired? Sammy Junior fail to properly rise to the task? After all, he's not used to having someone _human_ to play with. Maybe a real live human doesn't do it for Sammy Junior any more? Wasn't her blood demon enough for you? Wasn't it full of enough hell filth for your superior tastes?"

Dean knew it was a mistake. He'd smelled the alcohol on Sam's breath. He knew Sam was already barely keeping himself under control, and yet he still goaded his younger brother. He didn't care, Dean just wanted it over with so he could leave. The thought crossed his mind that maybe that was the reason he wasn't reacting as he saw Sam's fist swinging towards him.

With Dean making no attempt to block or move out of the way, Sam planted a solid right on Dean's jaw, snapping Dean's head to one side and following up with a punch to Dean's mid section. Dean went down, clutching his gut and gasping for air. Sam stood over him,

"You know Dean. I've just figured what a selfish bastard you really are. All your crap about you leaving to protect me? _Bullshit._ You're running 'cos you're a coward. Everything you've done, you've always put yourself first. The crossroads deal? We already know that was for you and not for my sake. You were just too weak to survive alone. You made that deal to get what _you_ wanted. And Hell? You couldn't handle the pain, so you happily agreed to dish it out to others. _You_ made that choice Dean. You made that choice just to save your own worthless neck, and you _enjoyed_ it you sick fuck! Really, if you weren't the almighty selfish fuck up that you are, none of this would be happening. If Lucifer rises? Well, that'll just be down to you brother, no one else. So, now you think it's ok for you to up and run away from it. You obviously don't give a _shit _about the rest of us. Yet again, Dean, you're showing me how much you care about nothin' and no-one. You're just out to save your own worthless hide.

XXX

Dean stayed down, rolling onto his back. He lay shaking his head in denial at Sam's words, horrified at what he was hearing.

"No! Sam….please….it's not…."

Hearing Dean's pleading tone, hearing him beg. It was too much. Sam saw red. He felt the power surge through his body and almost without thinking he raised both hands, ready to direct it's force at Dean.

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	10. Chapter 10

**10.**

Frozen in disbelief, Dean watched as a haze of steely blue began to outline Sam's hands and fingers. The mist of colour appeared to grow more solid, pulsating slowly at first then quickly building to an explosion of brilliant ultramarine which flared from Sam towards Dean. Instinctively Dean tried to roll away from the flare, but he simply couldn't compete with the speed at which it travelled and it hit him down his right flank.

Coherent thought fled as the white hot jolt of terrible pain struck Dean and his body reacted. Dean felt as if every muscle on his right hand side had suddenly gone into spasm as he was subjected to a sensation ten times greater than the most torturous twists of muscle cramp he had ever experienced. Even the muscles and tendons in his neck felt like someone had stretched them and tied them into double knots.

Although he desperately wanted to, Sam's attack wouldn't allow Dean to scream out his internal agony. He was unaware of the tears falling freely down his face as his body continued to arch and buck in the grip of Sam's anger fuelled power.

XXX

Bobby frowned and looked up at the flickering and sizzling light above him.

"What the f…?"

His radio began to turn itself on and off and the row of land line phones hung on a nearby wall all began to blip and beep as their power was disconnected and reconnected again and again. Bobby leapt to his feet, quickly heading into the living room and grabbing a shotgun full of rock salt rounds. He raced out of the house to look for the boys and ground to a halt. All around, the air was full of static. He could actually feel it's feather like touch on his face, hands and the back of his neck. Bobby rapidly swung into full Hunter mode.

He spotted the Impala, noticing how it was positioned in relation to one of the older wrecks that he had laying around. A short distance beyond the Impala he had a partial view of Sam. Bobby didn't shout out, afraid of drawing the attention of whatever may be causing such a large field of electrical energy. Instead he visually plotted out a route that would take him over to Sam whilst affording the maximum amount of cover possible.

Keeping himself low and fighting the urge to run, Bobby started to make his way toward Sam's position. As he moved, Bobby began to grow more uncomfortable. Sam looked to be standing motionless, his eyes fixed on something to the front of him. Bobby wondered why Sam seemed to be showing no response to the energy filling the air at all. Bobby paused. Every instinct screamed at him that something wasn't right with Sam.

Bobby turned all his attention towards the young man, narrowing his field of focus down. Finally Bobby became aware of a strange grey blue glow which, from his line of sight, appeared to be hovering in front of Sam. At the same time, he wondered where Dean was.

XXX

Sam was lost. His every sense tuned into the exhilarating power inhabiting his whole body, the demon blood rushing through his veins, exciting him like never before. He closed his eyes, moaning at the sensation, feeling it deep down inside him. He felt the effect spread to his groin, felt himself harden, drawing another long, low groan of pleasure out of him. Any thoughts of Dean and the harm he might be inflicting on his older brother were driven completely out of his mind. All that mattered was to increase the impact on his body of the power, his all consuming desire to heighten his own pleasure. He could feel his groin throbbing and pulsating as his lust for the power within him reached new levels. Sam was virtually delirious. Nothing else existed for him, only this power, only the increasing thrill of it's effect, only the ever building pressure that was driving him towards a mind numbing climax.

Dean was helpless. His body continued to strain and jerk, tortured beyond normal limits by the deadly energy still being driven into him from the hands of his own brother. Mercifully, Dean himself had already lost all consciousness as Sam's supernatural power assaulted him.

Moving closer, Bobby removed the safety catch from the shotgun. Suddenly Sam threw his head back as he hit an orgasm that completely submerged him, threatening to sear his brain. His eyes squeezed shut as he gave into the intensity of his own glory, crowing and howling in animal ecstasy as hot semen was driven out of his body in a tsunami of waves. The inhuman sounds coming from Sam sent shivers of ice down Bobby's spine.

Muttering an apology under his breath, Bobby took aim and fired.

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	11. Chapter 11

**11.**

Sam stumbled as Bobby's shot caught him sideways on at the shoulder. It was enough to distract Sam and create a break in the energy flow, causing Sam to turn towards Bobby. Bobby didn't hesitate, shooting at Sam again immediately he presented a larger target area. The salt round caught Sam solidly in the centre of his chest, knocking him backwards off his feet and out of Bobby's line of sight.

Bobby used that moment to race toward where Sam had been stood. Hunkering down and using the Impala as cover Bobby kept his finger on the trigger as he peered around Dean's car to see where Sam was.

Sam lay on his back. He held both arms crossed over his chest, his shirt now peppered with holes and turning red from the blood springing from the numerous small flesh wounds caused by the rock salt crystals. Sam lifted his head as Bobby walked closer and stood over him, gun trained again at Sam's chest.

Bobby smiled grimly as he saw the light shimmering around Sam's hands and fingers begin to dull and fade. Sam looked up at Bobby, his eyes reflecting pain. Bobby fought against his own sympathy for Sam and his aversion towards hurting the boy. Using the butt of his gun he hit Sam solidly. Sam's head rolled to one side as he, at last, passed out. At the same time as Sam's eyes closed, the flaring field of energy emanating from him finally faded and died.

XXX

Bobby glanced around and spotted the figure of Dean laying unmoving nearby. For the moment he ignored Sam's needs, turning his attention to Dean. Bobby felt a knot of anxiety building and he unconsciously held his breath whilst he knelt down beside Dean. Reaching forward with a trembling hand, sought to find Dean's carotid pulse. His relief was so intense that Bobby had to fight back grateful tears when his probing fingers found what he was searching for. Ok, it was rapid and weak, as was Dean's breathing. But it was still there, and that meant so was Dean.

Bobby moved his hand to place it on Dean's forehead. The younger man's skin felt cool and clammy. Bobby gently attempted to rouse Dean. Uncertain where Sam had been targeting his brother, Bobby had no idea where Dean may be injured. For now Bobby kept his touch light, trying not to be a cause of further pain. Despite his words of encouragement, Dean remained unresponsive.

Bobby sighed as he tilted his baseball cap back, scratching his head.

"How the hell am I supposed to move you boys indoors? Crap but this is a mess!"

XXX

In the end, Bobby improvised. Grabbing a canvas dust sheet from the workshop, his nail gun and searching out two lengths of not quite straight but solid enough wood he quickly returned to Sam and Dean, both of whom remained unaware. Bobby folded the canvas down to a workable width and nail gunned it to the wood, one length either side of the canvas, creating a makeshift stretcher.

As he was finishing off his handiwork, he heard a low groan come from Sam. Bobby really hoped it wasn't necessary, but he kept the shotgun with him as he moved over to Sam's side. Getting down on one knee, he brushed Sam's hair off the young man's face.

"Sam? Sam it's Bobby. Come on son, open your eyes …. Hey…Sam, can you hear me son? You've, er, been hurt. I need to know you're here with me lad."

Sam groaned again, one hand trying to search out the source of his pain. Bobby grabbed Sam's hand in his own.

"Just lay still Sam. I know it hurts a bit…..well, p'raps more than a bit. C'mon, look at me Sam."

Sam's head turned slightly in the direction of Bobby's voice and his eyes cracked open a fraction, searching for the older Hunter. Bobby moved his face into Sam's line of sight, ensuring he kept the shotgun out of view.

"Ok..that's better. Listen Sam, I…um…_Crap_! Sam, you've been shot. Do you understand Sam?"

Sam's eyes opened a little wider and he formed a puzzled frown before screwing his eyes up and gasping as he became more aware that almost his whole upper body felt as if it was in flames. Bobby put his hand on Sam's forehead, trying to comfort him.

"S'alright Sam. You're gonna be ok. We'll deal with that pain once I get you inside. It'll be ok son."

Sam opened his eyes again,

"Wha..? How?"

"Do you remember anythin' Sam? Anythin' at all?"

Sam closed his eyes again and shook his head briefly, then he stilled. A small frown began to form and an instant later his eyes opened wide and he stared at Bobby in horror,

"_**Dean!"**_

XXX

Bobby's hands held Sam in place as Sam began to struggle to sit up.

"Calm down boy. You're in no fit state to do anythin' for Dean right now. I'm gonna help you both, ok? I need to get you both indoors, but I can only move you one at a time. It'll take a hell of a lot less time if you just settle and let me help you. Can you do that for me Sam?"

"I…I need to know. Is he ok?"

Bobby gave a heavy sigh,

"He's breathing, but he's out of it."

Sam nodded, relaxing a fraction although his expression remained fearful.

"Bobby….it was me. I hurt Dean….didn't I?"

"_**Sam…Enough**_! You're hurt, he's hurt. Save the inevitable guilt trip until I've taken care of you both. I need to get you back inside. Now, do you think you could walk with me? Otherwise I gotta get you laid on this stretcher so I can drag your ass in to the house and come back for Dean. Now. Which is it to be?

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	12. Chapter 12

**12.**

It was hard going for Bobby as he first took the majority of Sam's weight as Sam stumbled alongside him. Bobby then returned for Dean who was a dead weight and had to be manoeuvred onto the makeshift stretcher before being dragged across the yard. By the time he'd got Sam settled into a makeshift bed on the floor of the living room and Dean laid out on the couch Bobby was exhausted, but he didn't have the time to rest.

Sam helped as much as he was able whilst Bobby stripped him of his ruined shirt. All the while that Bobby cleaned and dressed the wounds on Sam's chest and shoulder, Sam himself kept a hold on Dean's limp hand.

Sam had begged Bobby to take care of Dean first, until Bobby had finally managed to convince the distressed young Hunter that Dean had no visible external wounds he could treat, other than the gash on his palm. Once he had finished with Sam, he began to do what he could for Dean whilst Sam watched.

He cut Dean's clothes from him to avoid moving the unconscious man as much as possible, hearing Sam catch his breath at the sight of an area of deep purple bruising on his brother's abdomen, the reminder of Sam punching his brother in the gut. Bobby kept his focus on his task, running expert hands down Dean's arms, across his shoulders and collar bone and on over his chest and ribs.

Finally he was able to reassure Sam that he had found no sign of cracks or breaks. Bobby did, however, find further bruising to Dean's back, evidencing Dean's landing hard onto the floor. Further checks to the lower half of Dean's body again revealed no bone damage. Really it appeared that there was little Bobby could do once he had dressed Dean's hand, except monitor his vitals and hope that Dean would come round given time and to pray there was no hidden internal damage.

Sam was both desperate for his brother to regain consciousness and, at the same time, terrified of how Dean would react to him when, _"if",_ Dean did come round.

XXX

Whilst they waited for Dean to show some sign of waking, Sam told Bobby what he could recall, his expression haunted by worry and shame. In turn, Bobby blushed slightly as he confessed to Sam that it was he who had shot Sam. Sam nodded, his eyes glistening,

"You had no choice Bobby, I get that. Just…Maybe you should've used real bullets."

Bobby stared at Sam in shock.

"Now why the hell would you say somthin' that dumb Sam?"

"Because I'm a monster and I'm clearly out of control."

Bobby's expression turned to one of annoyance as he looked at the hopeless expression on the young hunter's face,

"Fine. If a monster is all you are, maybe you _should_ be put down. But you won't get me to do it for you boy. Ever. You'll have to take care of that yourself, hear me? Hey! Maybe Dean'll even thank you for it, you know? For throwin' everythin' he's ever done for you to try to keep you safe your whole life right back in his face. Whaddya think? Sound like a plan?"

XXX

As that day ran into night both Bobby and Sam grew more and more worried about Dean's stillness. Dean had shown no reaction at all to any of Bobby's attempts to wake him. Even pain stimulus elicited no response.

The longer Dean laid with his eyes closed, the more the feelings of guilt and angst cloaked Sam. Bobby eventually insisted that Sam go to bed, although Sam was equally insistent that he wouldn't be able to sleep.

"I don't care _what_ you do boy. Sleep or otherwise. But your body needs to rest. If you really find you can't sleep, how about you think on what you're going to say to your brother when he wakes? How're you going to fix this Sam? 'Cos I'm tellin' you, this one's going to take more than puppy eyes and _"I'm sorry". _You and Dean, you_ can't _be apart. It just don't work. Somehow, and God alone knows how, you have to find a way to move on, both of you. Together….Now git!"

Bobby's words ringing in his ears, Sam slowly made his way to the bedroom he generally shared with Dean. He stood in the doorway and looked around the room, all the things that usually signalled Dean's presence were gone. There was no pile of dirty laundry on the floor in a corner, no jacket slung over the bedroom chair, no boots laying around having been kicked off indiscriminately.

Sam moved to sit on the edge of his bed. The signs of Dean leaving didn't make him boil with anger any more. Now he was afraid; afraid of himself, of what he might easily become without Dean there to ground him.

Sam smiled grimly as he sat and figured that maybe Dean _was_ the stronger of them after all. There was only Dean who could truly keep Sam's humanity tied to his soul, and that made Dean stronger than Sam himself could ever hope to be. Sam curled up on his side on the bed and let the hot tears flow.

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	13. Chapter 13

**13.**

Bobby woke. Sure that something had disturbed his sleep, other than the discomfort of attempting to sleep in an armchair. He checked the luminous dial on his watch, 2 a.m. Bobby slowed his breathing and sat, counting off seconds and listening in the dark. He'd got to forty when he heard the sound. It was almost a whisper, coming from Dean's direction, _"No…."_

Bobby quickly switched on the soft light of a table lamp next to his chair before moving over to where Dean lay. He reached out and held his palm to the young hunter's forehead. Although his eyes remained closed, Dean immediately tried to move his head away from the touch, his forehead creasing into a slight frown. Bobby moved his hand. Cupping Dean's cheek.

"Dean? C'mon son. It's time to wake up…Dean? Dean it's Bobby….can you open your eyes for me son?"

Bobby saw Dean's eye's flicker beneath his eyelids, heard a soft noise from Dean's throat. Bobby lowered his head before taking a deep breath and looking back at the hunter to try again.

"Dean. I need you to look at me, you hear? It's safe…it's time to come back now."

He saw Dean swallow, then held his breath in anticipation as he watched Dean battle to open his eyes. Blinking slowly, Dean finally managed to crack his eyes half open.

"That's it son, that's right. You're doin' good. Ol' Bobby's here. You're safe. Are you hearing me boy?"

Dean fixed his focus on Bobby's face in reply. Bobby smiled, unable to help himself.

"It's good to see you son. You're going to be fine, ok? I'm going to fetch you some water. Stay with me now? I'll be right back."

Dean had his eyes closed again when Bobby returned with a glass of water, he opened them as soon as Bobby approached, following Bobby's movements with his gaze. Bobby gently lifted Dean's head, noticing the look of pain that flashed across Dean's face but making no comment on it as he put the glass to Dean's lips,

"Slow sips, take it steady…..good. That's good."

Dean opened his mouth and spoke, his voice soft and weak, his words a kick in the gut to Bobby.

"Why…why didn't Sam finish me? Why didn't he? I wanted him…..to finish it."

XXX

Bobby physically flinched at Dean's words. He turned away, taking a couple of deep breaths to steady himself. Bobby's eyes were narrowed when he finally looked at Dean again,

"Well son. All I can say is I guess we don't always get what we want now, do we? Especially when what we think we want is nothin' like what we really need."

Dean ignored Bobby's answer,

"Why didn't he kill me Bobby?"

Bobby stood up, setting the glass of water down on the nearby coffee table. He could feel himself starting to get irritated again. He wanted off this carrousel and he didn't bother to hide it in the tone of his voice,

"Because I stopped him. He'd lost it an' I could see he _was_ lookin' like killing you an' I didn't want him to. So, sorry about that but you can blame me. It's my fault you're alive. Happy now? _Jeeze_….what is it with you two? You know what? If your lives stink that bad, if you really do hate yourselves and each other that much, why don't you both just haul your assess to different parts of the planet and take up basket weaving? Please…put yourselves out of _all_ our miseries, 'cos I for one am sick and tired of being pig in the middle between you both. Ok Dean? You hearin' me? If it's really what you want, go ahead, be the looser you obviously think you are. Crawl into a hole and leave the rest of us to get on with the job of stopping the fucking seals being broken. Otherwise? Why don't you an' Sam both quit snarlin' at each other and try focusin' on the _real_ enemies instead?

I'm going to my bed. You two can let me know what you've decided later. Unless I find you're both dead when I get up, at which point I guess I'll know your answer without you telling me and, even better? I won't have to bother cooking another wasted breakfast. Will I? _Good night!"_

XXX

Bobby's sudden departure surprised the hell out of Dean. Trying not to make any sudden, and potentially painful moves, Dean glanced around; quickly realising that Sam wasn't with him either. They had both left him on his own.

Dean rested his head back and considered the implications. Whenever he had been hurt before, someone was always there, watching over him. Ready to act if anything untoward happened to him. And he always did the same for them. Ready to reassure them, to make certain they knew where they were, to care for them in whatever way was necessary.

Dean had felt the direct force of his brother's power. Who knew what effect it could have had on him? And yet no one stayed by his side. Dean swallowed hard to rid himself of the unmanly lump forming in his throat, mentally berating himself for his weakness and his moment of self pity. Telling himself he shouldn't _expect_ anyone to look out for him. After all, isn't that how the day had finally come down to this? Everyone around him only wanting to use him; no one caring about what _he_ wanted? Well, they could all go screw themselves. Dean Winchester was nobody's errand boy, not any more, be they Demon, Angel or family.

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	14. Chapter 14

**14.**

Holding on tight to the back of the couch, Dean steadily pulled himself up until he was sat upright. The movement seemed to trigger a series of aches and pains in every muscle and every bone throughout his body. Even his skin felt raw and hypersensitive. Panting, Dean took a moment, hoping the time would allow the hurt to diminish.

He planted both feet on the floor, looking around for any sign of his pants and boots. Standing became a further test of Dean's resolve. His legs felt like he hadn't had the use of them for months and, when Dean tried to stand straight, he had to clamp a hand over his mouth to muffle his involuntary cry as he clutched at his abdomen with the other hand. Sharp, searing shafts of pain tore through him, as though something inside was using a serrated knife to try to cut it's way out through his gut.

Keeping one arm folded over his stomach, Dean hunched over a little and tried to focus on levelling his breathing. He knew more than enough to realise that his symptoms did not bode well and that, at any other time, he would soon be making a trip to the emergency department under Sam's watchful glare whether he wanted to or not.

Dean shrugged the thought away. The struggle to put on his jeans and boots nearly finished him and served to add disquieting feelings of rolling nausea to his ever growing list of physical discomfort; but still Dean refused to give in. He spotted his duffle and gun on the kitchen table. By the time he made it outdoors, Dean was exhausted and his vision was starting to blur. The small voice of reason inside his head told him to stop. To go back inside. To wake Bobby and ask to be taken to the hospital. His stubborn determination, his own "Deanness," however, over rode it.

XXX

Through an act of almost super human effort, Dean finally made it across the yard to the Impala. By then a fine tremor had begun to run throughout his whole body and he could no longer keep himself from making small noises of pain. He threw his belongings unceremoniously into the trunk and stumbled to the driver's side door, instantly having to grab onto the top edge of the open car door to support himself as his feelings of nausea decided to become so much more than that.

Still clinging onto the door of the Impala, Dean began to wretch. Weakened and dazed, he could do nothing to stop himself from suddenly vomiting quantities of thick liquid onto the floor at the side of his car. His mouth and throat were filled with the bitter tang of copper as Dean spewed blood. His head pounded and the act of throwing up re-awoke the razor sharp pains in his stomach.

The vomiting gave way to dry heaving. Finally they stopped and Dean drew huge lungs full of air before hurrying to get himself sat in the car, certain that his legs were not going to hold him much longer. His temperature had spiked and the shaking in his hands had worsened, causing him to struggle to put the key in the ignition. Dean smiled grimly once he achieved the task. He wiped the sweat out of his eyes with the back of his hand and started the engine.

XXX

A sound cut through Sam's nightmares and he woke abruptly. Tuning into the faint noise, Sam recognised it instantly as the sound of the Impala's engine, _Dean!_

Sitting up quickly, Sam hissed at the sting of pain that immediately shot through the numerous small wounds in his shoulder and chest where the rock salt crystals had cut into him,

"_**Dammit!"**_

Clutching one hand at his chest, Sam made his way out of the bedroom, down the stairs and into the yard as quickly as he could, yelling for Bobby on route.

XXX

Hearing Sam's shout, Bobby grimaced, wishing he were hard enough to turn over and leave both boys to get on with it. Instead, he hauled himself out of bed muttering to himself _"What now Godammit!_ _Can't they leave it till mornin'?" _whilst at the same time having to quell the knot of worry and anxiety, wondering if Dean's condition had worsened?

XXX

As Dean began to pull out of the salvage yard, he was suddenly aware of someone sitting alongside him in the passenger seat. He turned to look.

"What the f…..? Who the hell are you?"

Sat at the side of him was an older man. He was balding and dressed in a smart dark suit, white shirt and tie. Head slightly cocked to one side, he looked at Dean in an appraising manner.

"Don't tell me. You're another freakin' angel; right?

The man smiled benignly,

"I'm here to help you, young man, that's all."

Dean turned away from the stranger, returning his attention to the road ahead,

"Yeah? Well, party's over. You've obviously not heard, I've quit. I'm done. I've had _**enough!**_

The angel simply shook his head whilst continuing to smile mildly, and he clicked his fingers.

XXX

Sam skidded to a halt as he saw the Impala pull out of the gates,

"_**Shit!"**_

He turned, intent on getting back indoors, grabbing his cell and ringing his brother. He started in surprise as he found his way unexpectedly blocked by a balding man in a smart suit.

"_Sonofa….."_

The man smiled broadly at Sam, winked once, and clicked his fingers.

XXX

Bobby was halfway down the stairs, when he stopped. Puzzled, he looked around. He had absolutely no idea why he was out of bed and heading downstairs. He turned to look back up toward his bedroom door, before he then looked down at himself. Yep, he was in his P.J.'s. So why the hell wasn't he in bed?

Bobby shook his head, _"Must've been damn sleepwalking. Jeeze, I'm getting too old."_

And with that, Bobby wandered back to his still warm bed, quickly slipping into a dreamless and peaceful sleep.

**END**

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**Thank you for reading. It would be really great if you could spare the time to give me your views and feedback. **_Chick Feed X_


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